Time Stops

What would happen if the world was taken away from someone and time were just to stop? What would it be like to try and become a part of that world when you’re allowed to experience it again? Seeing how things have continued on without you being there and finding that your existence might not have been as important as you might have thought or felt. How can my current life go on without me here?

I have a family member that has been in a private minimum security jail for the past 5 years. He is going back home tomorrow after all of that time inside the same place. I worry that the change will be too much. He’s had TV and access as far as music and magazines but to actually be a part of it is completely different. How will it feel to come back to your home and find everyone 5 years older, your family, dog and the trees in the yard with how much they’ve reached farther into the sky.

Would it be like walking into a weird dream that I myself have had before. Coming home to my house only to find strangers living there and I am no longer wanted. Or would it be like blinking and although the characters have changed or aged, everything is still the same?

I worry about the expectations that he has of himself and his thoughts of everything coming together quickly and perfect. He’s a smart young man although I think being where he is, has changed his ability to realize reality as what it is today. He’s actually been teaching other men there and helping them get their GED. Hopefully some of them will be able to leave there and be a better person than when they went in. I was glad to hear that he kept his mind sharp and helped to share that with others.

What would it be like to enter a familiar place and yet still be a stranger?  I would worry about still being loved but I don’t know if that’s what he’s going to be feeling or not. I love my entire family, even those I don’t speak with, I would never wish any ill harm. My love for him is unconditional and I have complete faith that once he gets over the shock and is back to his old / new self, that he’ll be better than ever.

But I can still worry.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

About meinaboxblog

I like to think I'm a normal everyday woman but my mind tells me otherwise. I fight my battles and post them here. I don't tell my family and real life friends that I write here. This is my own little way of having "someone" to talk to. My own little therapy session if you will. I welcome comments and opinions but I have enough negativity to last a lifetime already . My world is changing and now more than ever I need support and encouragement but I'm still too afraid to let anyone know that it's me writing here.