What Would That Be Like?

The cold weather is coming and although I’m a big fan of hot chocolate, comfy blankets and snuggling up to watch a movie, the cold scares me.  My house was built in 1956 and it shows it’s old bones during the winter time. Well, it tends to show it’s old bones throughout the year but I feel it most during the winter.

I’m not sure what type of insulation was in place back then but I know it’s had to have worn out by now. I’ve seen a yellow type fibreglass before when trying to fix a roof leak so I know they did use some.  Although you would never know it, I think back then they did do it right, it’s just not been updated.

My mother replaced most of the jalousie windows when I was younger, not sure how young but around a teenager. There is one side of the house where she couldn’t get them changed. I think it was because of the size, it’s like putting three windows in a row so it’s quite large. The others are very thin, I think you’d call them single pane?  The large windows in the front of the house are broken and that happened not long after getting them. One side doesn’t open any longer and stays in a partially open position so we keep it covered with plastic year round. It has a screen so you can’t see it from the road and it’s not large enough for anyone to crawl into so it’s been okay. The other side to it still opens which is a lifesaver in the times that we just need some fresh air in the house.

Now, the other windows in the bedrooms, they are still thin and you can stand by them and feel the air slowly coming in. We have window a/c units in two of the rooms so one of the rooms doesn’t have real access to use the window since no one is tall enough to see over it like that. But summertime here without a/c would be worse than not seeing out that window.

Now that you know the structure of the windows in the front of the house, you might know a little of why winter scares me. I sleep in the room that used to be my mothers’ room and even back then it was still the coldest room in the house. I don’t know why this room chooses to be so cold but again it could be the age of the insulation. But we are at the time of year when we have to decide if it’s time to put the plastic back up on all the windows and block off the back room.  We have a back room, the people before us took a Florida room and closed it in to make an additional room. I don’t know how much they knew or didn’t know about construction but I know it wasn’t done right. There is no insulation out there and that was easy to see when I had to fix the roof and take down part of the ceiling. It’s basically brick on the outside covered by sheet board on the inside. So, during winter it’s closed and plastic is put on the door. We grab what we need and leave it because you don’t want to be caught on a cold day having to go out there. It’s more like a storage area for us now and isn’t really usable.

So I know this probably makes no sense as I jump around a bit this morning with jitters after watching the weatherman.  There’s just no money to fix anything or make it better and I’m really tired of trying all these years and not having it pay off even just a little. Why can’t I go to bed at night knowing that nothing is going to fall apart or break or get broken into? I just want one really good night of real rest without worry. What would that be like?


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About meinaboxblog

I like to think I'm a normal everyday woman but my mind tells me otherwise. I fight my battles and post them here. I don't tell my family and real life friends that I write here. This is my own little way of having "someone" to talk to. My own little therapy session if you will. I welcome comments and opinions but I have enough negativity to last a lifetime already . My world is changing and now more than ever I need support and encouragement but I'm still too afraid to let anyone know that it's me writing here.