Trickle to a Roar

There are so many emotions that our minds are capable of reflecting upon us. One minute we can be experiencing the greatest moment of our life up to that point. The next moment it all comes crashing down to feel like our lowest moment ever.

I’ve read before where we are in control of our emotions, but if they’re not supposed to be shown or felt, then why do we have them? Would we be stifling an important part of being human if we changed the way we think just to make us feel better? Doesn’t emotion sometimes help us grow and become stronger at times?

The euphoria of the good emotions are addictive so that when the depression of the lows are introduced, we shun them. Could the lows be telling us it’s time to change what we’re doing or where we are or whatever is happening in life at the moment? How would someone in an abusive relationship know it’s wrong if all they felt were the good emotions? And how would someone who won the lottery ever know when they are taking the wrong step in spending if their “gut feeling” wasn’t there?

It’s a flip of the coin for me actually, I do love the good feelings and lately, I’ve had my share of the bad ones. Being ready for something good to happen is an understatement for me lately. However, I know that when something good does happen, no matter how small, it will mean something to me because I would treasure the feeling that I’ve missed. Experiencing the bad feelings makes me miss feeling good again and it is what I’m striving for. The road to getting there though, everyone seems to have a different map.

So then, with everyone having a different way of finding their happiness, where does one start? Maybe with the little things, I like watching birds out my window for instance. I like seeing the first sunlight come across the drapes in the living room. These things give me moments of the “feel good” that I’m looking for. But I don’t know if I can live on just a trickle of the good emotion, so how can I make it more and more often?

It’s a journey I guess, one of self-discovery and learning what makes me happy. I’ve always made others happy so I don’t know truly what makes me happy. Who knows where it will lead me to but I’m willing to try. What’s the worst that can happen? I stay feeling down, well I’m already there so okay.

Let’s see what happens.


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About meinaboxblog

I like to think I'm a normal everyday woman but my mind tells me otherwise. I fight my battles and post them here. I don't tell my family and real life friends that I write here. This is my own little way of having "someone" to talk to. My own little therapy session if you will. I welcome comments and opinions but I have enough negativity to last a lifetime already . My world is changing and now more than ever I need support and encouragement but I'm still too afraid to let anyone know that it's me writing here.