Another Step

We took another step into finding a place to move into to. This will take us away from the family home that we’ve had since I was three years old. My son (nephew) was brought home from the hospital to this house as was my granddaughter. We lived here when my father passed, I was 7 years old and can still remember him leaving for the hospital. He never came home from the hospital after that. This is also the house we lived in when my mother passed away. My sister came down that night and slept in my bed with me for comfort. It was like when we were kids and would sleep on the floor and pretend to camp except this time we were adults, in a bed and both crying.

The things that these walls have seen and the things that I remember no matter good or bad. Seven children being raised by a single mother, 5 girls in the middle and 2 boys on the end. I don’t know how she did it and certainly with only one bathroom in the house, specially when puberty came roaring through!

We’ve found a home out of the city, more in the woods is what I call it. It has a paved road, thank heavens, but there is a lot of wildlife out there. A fantastic school and family close by so I’m willing to learn how to live without a store less than 20 miles away. Quality of life is high on my list for the family and safety. You might remember from past posts of how the violence where we are has just been growing at such an alarming rate, that I’m finally scared to live here.

I’ve never actually purchased a home before, the one we have I guess you could say I purchased it since I paid all of the lawyer fees for probate and then again lawyer fees when the state said they wanted it to pay them back for my mothers dialysis treatments, yes they actually did say that. I cashed in my 401k and went to battle with an amazing lawyer. So even though it’s the same family home, I did pay for it in a sense.

Learning what it takes to purchase a home is such an experience, so stressful. Why doesn’t anyone truly mention the stress and the self reflection that happens when you try to purchase a new place. I’ve been working so hard on my credit and now I’m second guessing myself on whether or not I’ve done enough. We are putting a bid in on the home but another realtor was waiting outside to show someone the same place just as we were finishing up so I don’t know how it’s going to go. It’s not much more room than we have here but there is another bathroom. It’s safe and so very close to family; I can’t imagine having family over and just sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee and talking while we watch the grandkids play outside, that thought is just mind-blowing to me.

If anyone out there that might be reading this, please pray for us or just think good thoughts for us if you wouldn’t mind. I’m second guessing everything and it’s scary, is it supposed to be scary? Wouldn’t that be saved for the first night you sleep in a new place? Getting used to it being so quiet there I think is going to be a big adjustment and they tell me that the wildlife will come up in your yard at night and in the early morning. So I wouldn’t mind seeing some dear but I really don’t want any bears, pigs or panthers. What will be the one thing that really throws me off? Maybe I’ll have to start a poll to see what everyone thinks?

Well, it’s not in the bag yet so it could all be for not. But it just felt right when I pulled up to it. We’ll have to see, please with me luck!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

About meinaboxblog

I like to think I'm a normal everyday woman but my mind tells me otherwise. I fight my battles and post them here. I don't tell my family and real life friends that I write here. This is my own little way of having "someone" to talk to. My own little therapy session if you will. I welcome comments and opinions but I have enough negativity to last a lifetime already . My world is changing and now more than ever I need support and encouragement but I'm still too afraid to let anyone know that it's me writing here.