Right Answer Please

My brother stopped by this morning (super early) as he got off of work. I’ve had his son with me for the past three days during his spring break. He’s 16 and on the autism spectrum. He’s a super nice boy and if you didn’t know him, you wouldn’t know until you talked to him. Sometimes people still don’t realize that he’s on the spectrum and only think that he talks a lot about comics.

Comics are the one thing he’s truly singled out and has been focused on for years. I took him to MegaCon when he was 14 and he had the chance to meet Stan Lee for a book signing. We got stuck in line because it was backed up and we just happened to still be with Mr Lee when this happened. I remember my nephew telling him that he was his idol ever since he was little. Mr Lee just gave a little chuckle, truly my nephew was 14, how much younger could he have been?

My brother and his ex-wife have been on a journey of themselves since their divorce. He has moved on and is with someone else while she is taking every opportunity to vacation and not bring her son. She shares a house with her sister and her sisters two young children. I used to bring my granddaughter over to play with the older girl but she the little girl was becoming very rude and disrespectful. I don’t allow disrespect in my house from anyone to anyone. So when the mother (her sister) let it keep happening without correcting it, I stopped taking my granddaughter over for visits.

My nephew broke down to me last night saying that he doesn’t like living there. He does go between two houses so he’s talking about his mothers (with his aunt and kids). He said she doesn’t do anything that bothers him but she doesn’t stick up for him either. The kids are very disrespectful of his privacy and of his belongings. They’re rude to the point that they will lay in the doorway so that he cannot shut his door and the mother does nothing to help. “They’re just kids, leave them alone” is what she tells him. I say they’re kids that need to learn manners and how not to be rude. I don’t care how old a child is, there is always a time to teach them and explain why they shouldn’t do something.

I told my brother about this when he was here this morning but he doesn’t know what he can do. My nephew is 16 so normally at that age, they can choose who they want to live with. With him being on the spectrum, I don’t know how that changes. Also, my brother just started a new job so he has crazy hours from 7 pm to about 5 am so he’s not home during the night time. He’s trying to work towards a new schedule but it’s not looking like anytime soon.

We have an appointment to look at a house tomorrow that is up for sale. My nephew was with us when we got the news that we can look on a Sunday and he is upset. He told me once that when we move, he’s not going to have anywhere to go when his mother and father are fighting and don’t talk to each other. I’ve reassured him that he can come up for summer when he doesn’t have summer school and then long weekends if they’ll bring him up.

I would love to say he could go with us but I just don’t know if I can do it. There is so much that has to be done and that I have to do alone, it just wouldn’t be fair that I couldn’t get done what he needs. In all honesty, he is the one person that I will miss not having so close to me. I’ll teach him how to video chat and that might help a little but I don’t know what else to do.

We’re going to take him with us tomorrow when we go look at the house. I’m not sure if this is a good decision or not. Maybe he will feel better after seeing it but then again it could make him feel like it’s going to be so far away? I wish I knew the answers and I wish I could ask my mom, she always knew the right thing to say.

So my birthday present tomorrow is looking at a house that I just feel I’m going to fall in love with. I just hope that I have enough money and we can do it fast enough. That’s my birthday wish.

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About meinaboxblog

I like to think I'm a normal everyday woman but my mind tells me otherwise. I fight my battles and post them here. I don't tell my family and real life friends that I write here. This is my own little way of having "someone" to talk to. My own little therapy session if you will. I welcome comments and opinions but I have enough negativity to last a lifetime already . My world is changing and now more than ever I need support and encouragement but I'm still too afraid to let anyone know that it's me writing here.